Ask Loved Ones About Our Blind Spots

We rarely listen to the advice and perspectives of those closest to us. Our partner can tell us until the sun goes supernova that we look good in blue, but we don’t hear it until a respected outsiders casually mentions, “Hey, that blue shirt looks good on you.” “What a revelation!” we suddenly think. “Honey, today I learned that I look good in blue! Mary Bob told me so.” Commence annoyed eye rolling. This example is silly, but substitute “You look good in blue,” with “You’re qualified for our dream job,” or “You new business idea is fantastic.” What do we lose by not listening to truths like those? Why don’t we listen to the people who know us best and love us most regarding our most critical limiting beliefs? Why must it take a casual comment from a disinterested outsider before we finally see the truth? Why do we hold ourselves back like this?

It’s not about expertise, because sometimes our partners, friends, and other loved ones are, in fact, true experts on these topics. Sometimes that’s precisely why they’ve been telling us the truth for so long.

A solution, then, is to sit down with those closest to us and ask, point blank, what they see as our blind spots. What have they been telling us that we don’t hear? Then shut up and listen. Take notes afterward if it helps. Don’t respond with anything other than clarification and gratitude.

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